Silence of the soul

The most horrible experience for any child has to be sexual abuse and violence. The abuser could be someone at home or a stranger, but the hollow feeling that the ordeal creates in the child’s mind and soul is unbearable and unforgivable.

Child abuse has been on top of the discussion charts recently, but how far is the society willing to go to ensure each child’s right to innocence and sexual non-violence is questionable.

I am sure that if someone broke into your house and robbed you of your belongings there will be no stone unturned to capture the culprits and hopefully retrieve your precious jewels, money, electronics, etc. Agreed that one cannot retrieve what a child abuse victim has lost but, how is the child any lesser than gold, money or electronics?

I can bet my last penny on the fact that if you identify a family member who has the habit of stealing he/she will not be entertained for family gatherings or even if they are, the individual will be closely monitored by other relatives. How then is it defaming to not allow a family member identified as a child abuser from entering the house or being close to a child or children? Again, is the child any less than all the other tangible goods under the roof?

A child who has been violated is not an embarrassment. It is a serious concern and no responsible adult should tolerate such acts no matter who the perpetrator might be. It is defaming when the family refuses to step up and fight for the child.

If the abuser is a relative, the family causes more emotional damage to the child by entertaining that person at home and forcing the child to be well-behaved to the perpetrator whom he or she could be terrified of. Slightly older children might just be confused and can be led to think that they are in love with the abuser, which is their way of shutting away from horrifying reality.

Parents need to open up to their children and help them feel comfortable discussing issues that trouble them. If you are busy putting away money to buy the latest LED TV it will also be helpful to invest a little time in your child just to be sure that he/she is okay and just growing up fine. There is nothing worse than loosing a child to sick-headed individuals and their disgusting fantasies.

Stories of child raped by caretaker, helper, uncle, step-parent, cousin, etc. have troubled our minds for a long time. Irking stories of child abuse have been communicated in the media time and again. The point is, don’t let a child suffer and loose their soul because you are scared of what people MAY think or speak. Don’t let a child’s perpetrator get away.

If you feel that you fancy children in the wrong manner seek help. No child today is responsible for what must have happened to you in the past. If someone couldn't help you in the past, focus your energy to protect a child today. Please don’t burn a child’s soul by violating their body!

The mainstream challenge

I think it is not a bad idea to feed my thoughts, to the cipher readers who follow my blog, on the way specially abled people (including myself) are treated by mainstream.

Okay, so I walk differently and doctors say it is partial cerebral palsy. Mummy takes it a lot more seriously than she should and Dad is emotionally sensitive about this topic. Natural for any parents to be this way. There are individuals with greater challenges than myself and every time I see them I realise the energy that remains unused for the betterment of people like myself or those who scale the tougher heights of challenges.

Long long ago, when I was in school, I had those inquisitive kids who wanted to know why I walked the way I do. Some just got to be friends and accepted me the way I was. No doubts Mummy thought I had to consistently top the class (preferably school) to offset the physical 'drawback'. But what I really would have loved to do back then was to be in the basket ball team. That is right. Just because one is physically different it does not mean that you cannot enjoy or have a passion for sports, dance or any other physical activity. The doctors said I needed a lot of physical activity but except for Mum who was bent on having me trained in Bharatnatyam (true trait of the Keralite mother) I don't think I was seen as a sports prospect. No denying the fact that I can't jog or run, squat, walk for long or jump, let alone do frog jumps. But hey, except for a few kind words from the Physical Education teachers and opportunities to let me try for the sake of it I was gradually conditioned to believe that I can't do it. My question today is WHY NOT?

Why is it so difficult to mold somebody who has the aspiration or the will to do it? Why are students with challenges so often ignored or left out from the talent competitions and sports days? Why do many educators hesitate to take up the challenge of conditioning a specially abled student to be a mainstream achiever?

 

My Bhratnatyam master used to train me to be able to perform on stage and at present I have a Kathak guru who responded 'why not' when I asked her if I can learn Kathak. My Karate instructor used to push me to do push ups when others did frog jumps. I had to punch harder and faster when others practiced the kicks. I never will or can forget these few people who have nurtured in me the confidence that I have today.

I clearly remember not being able to pick up dance steps very quickly during school days and I asked our dance teacher if she could go slower or take a few extra classes in order for me to pick up. She gave me some fancy explanation about me having to concentrate harder in class. No brownie points for knowing that the teacher's favorite dancing queens got all the special attention to correct their posture, style and grace. Sorry, I was not really the prom queen material in school either.

It starts in the schools and many times the educators can make all the difference. Parents of challenged children are constantly emotional about their child's condition and it takes a lot for them to be strong about it and accept it as a part of their lives. Besides this they also need to strengthen the child to grow with their condition and face life as normally as possible. At times the individual needs to find the strength within themselves to overcome their challenged capabilities and lend emotional support to their family members. This process will be a lot simpler if the school or learning center encouraged the challenged student to think and perform normally.

A condition might not require the student to be in a special needs school and there is so much going on about awareness and mainstream acceptance of the specially abled. This is not going to be a reality till the adults who take on the roles as teachers accept these student and make them feel that they are normal. Normal students need to be trained or taught to accept challenged peers. We don't have tails and horns. We are human too!

Don't really need to be in one of the developed countries with advanced regulations to make life normal for the physically or mentally challenged. A bit of commonsense and inducing some thoughts to your action can do the trick. Agreed that communicating and working with those who are mentally or physically different can be confusing or challenging but it is not impossible.

The next time you come across a challenged student or peer think twice before saying they can't do something. At times the will is so strong that the differently abled achiever can leave the mainstream stars way behind.

This is it

So here I am finally taking a break form the corporate world, waking up late, scanning overseas universities (that my folks are never going to let me go to), available for long chats with friends, randomly screening job sites, reading again and have finally set up my blogger account. Big pat on Ancy's back! This has been a work in progress for almost 18 months now. That is right, 18 months before I set up this blogger account and start typing my random thoughts. It was almost an embarrassment to say that I do not blog in spite of being a PR and marketing professional.  I felt some people almost thought I was faking all my experience.

Anyways, now that I have entered the bloggers world, what is next? Do I just sit around and wait for the next big brain wave, type it out and get mass followers (accompanied by lots of appreciation for the intellectual trickle) or will there be some sort of an orientation day followed by snacks?

Till I figure out if there actually is an induction program for this latest feather on my 'core-skills' list guess I shall look around for some encouragement and direction in all the blogger support articles that are available online. 

All the best to all baby bloggers (including myself)!