What's in a name?

'What's in a name? That which we call a rose By any other name would smell as sweet.' Great stuff, but seriously there should be a legal system in place so that SOME mallu parents stop naming their kids with such atrocious names! Aldo is a store, Audi is a CAR goddammit, Salu - ahem ahem, Gregarious - POOR chap! Digol - for flu and running nose am guessing, Jofy - bole tho? Huxely - sm kinda new luxury dish washing liquid perhaps, Berny - really?and SHANKY - tell me this is a joke!
I do not have the most interesting name and I need to probably change it as well. But the ones above need some help ASAP.